...friendship...

...i believe in friendship...I believe dat it's so healthy for us..I know dat if it was not for my fren, I wud be in a different place today n not a better place!...AZURA, my cute sis n JULIA my pretty sis, awesome and da most understanding frens dat I ever have...
Sis Julia, Sis Azura n Sis Layla.....u all r always there for me no matter I am down or happy...willing to share my burden togetha wif me n take cares for me so much...
Really appreciate frens like Sis Julia, Sis Azura n Sis Layla...those gurls encourage me to be more confidence....Thanks a lot gurls....luv u ollz...muaaahhh...

***Aku Milik Tuhanku***

Apakah pendirian hidupmu?
Azam ku tak mungkin kau jadikan kelabu
Tepis-tepis kata yg sinis Yang panas ku jadikan membeku
Bahagia aku kemudi selalu
Biar ku menuju jalan tak berbiku
Biarkan cemburu berkubur
Asalkan tak cemari hidupku
Biarkan ku senyum selalu Tandanya ku tiada seteru
Jangan kau terpenjuru
Jangan kau bercelaru Diriku bukan milikmu*

"Ya Allah... Tunjukkan kepada kami yang benar dan jadikan pilihan kami mengikuti yang benar itu. Dan juga tunjukkan kepada kami yang tidak benar dan permudahkan kami meninggalkannya."

*********************************************************************************************

"Aku mencintaimu kerana agama yang ada padamu,

jika kau hilangkan agama dalam dirimu,

hilanglah cintaku padamu."

(Imam Nawawi)

...carilah hatimu...

...hepi bufday abang...

...heppy besday...Wishing you good health and happiness in life..May this birthday be just the beginning of a year filled with happy memories, wonderful moments and shining dreams...year 2010 is here...I hope 4 new beginning n we will learnt from mistakes..year 2009 was too hectic 2 me..everything changed n it doesn't go as it planned...anyway, I'll get rid soon n I take it as a lesson of life...

***forgiveness***

4giveness is miraculous act..2 be truly free, 2 be unencumbered by da past..is dats very difficult n oftentimes near impossible 4 me 2 go there..how can I 4give really bad behavior??..how can I 4give sumeone who has wrong or betrayed me??..huurrmm..I continue 2 be upset by da fact dats my love had an affair..it continues 2 bring up feelings of betrayal n rejection..n wif those feelings comes da xtra-add charge of unworthiness n being unlovable..how I'm suppose 2 muve into a new life wif self-esteem, confidence n sense of empowerment I am dragging dat weight around??..
by forgiving sumeone else..I also forgive myself...I huv da freedom n power 2 create my best life possible...

...huuurrmm...

I was beyond boiling point when he told me his decision to go Uncle Chillis..I wanted to run away n back home..I'm currently much hotter than the sun noe..huh!!..wut to do..I joined them..one of the song is Nobody -Wondergirls..juz look at the lyrics..
You know I still love you baby
And it will never change
(Saranghae)

I want nobody nobody but you
I want nobody nobody but you
How can I be with another
I don’t want any other
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

Why are you trying to
To make me leave ya
I know what you’re thinking
Baby why aren’t you listening
How can I just
Just love someone else and
Forget you completely
When I know you still love me

Telling me you’re not good enough
My life with you is just too tough
You know it’s not right so
Just stop and come back boy
How can this be
When we were meant to be


I want nobody nobody but you
I want nobody nobody but you
How can I be with another
I don’t want any other
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

I want nobody nobody but you
I want nobody nobody but you
How can I be with another
I don’t want any other
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

Why can’t we just
Just be like this
Cause it’s you that I need
And nothing else until the end
Who else can ever make me feel
The way I feel when I’m with you
No one will ever do

Telling me you’re not good enough
My life with you is just too tough
You know me enough so
You know what I need boy
Right next to you is where I need to be

I want nobody nobody but you
I want nobody nobody but you
How can I be with another
I don’t want any other
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

I want nobody nobody but you
I want nobody nobody but you
How can I be with another
I don’t want any other
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

I don’t want no body, body
I don’t want no body, body

Honey you know it’s you that I want
It’s you that I need
Why can’t you see

I want nobody nobody but you
I want nobody nobody but you
How can I be with another
I don’t want any other
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

Back to the days
When we were so young and wild and free
Nothing else matters other than you and me
So tell me why can’t it be
Please let me live my life my way
Why do you push me away
I don’t want nobody nobody nobody nobody but you

huurrmm..not being able to control myself again last night, I shared some part of it with a fren on fb chatting, trying to distract myself..not feeling any tiredness, I couldn't stop thinking about it over and over again...I knew I shouldn't but I left him sitting behind me waiting for me to go to sleep..until I finally said I'm off to bed at 4am..

trying to get into slumber with such strong emotion worsens it..already puffy from previous hours cry, tears still flowed..it's so damn difficult to stop the train of thought while I tired to concentrate on not thinking and sleep..after an hour or so I forgot how I finally fell asleep..

my husbnd woke me and asked whether I want to follow them to go genting..knowing myself had not enough sleep I refused..my eyes wouldnt let me have any confidence anyway again today..I went back to sleep..apparently they haven't gone out..he was still in da room..believing dat I'm still sleeping...

Amarah

Wanita bukanlah perhiasan mata
Wanita adalah pelengkap di jiwa
Yang perlu kau corak dan bimbingi dia
Dan pasti bukan sekadar dengan kata-kata

Manis mulut lidah kau berapi
Tanpa sedari hati kau sakiti
Ku menghargai segalanya
Namun mungkin kau yang lupa
Fikirkanlah dengarkanlah suaraku

Kau tak bisa hapuskan amarah
Walaupun engkau tahu
Aku mahu kamu mahu
Aku tahu kamu tahu
Ku takkan tunjukkanku amarah
Kerana aku tahu segala yang berlaku
Tetap akan berlaku di mana kudratku
Dia yang menentu Dia yang menentu

Hati wanita terlalu rapuh kau genggami
Yang ingin selalu dimanja dan disayangi
Ku bukan tagih janji yang kau hancuri